Healing Sessions
by MarisolM
Summary: A small series of one-shots that deal with Katara and Zuko forgiving their pasts, assuaging their differences... and realizing that Destiny truly is a funny thing. Zutara. Alternate Finale.
1. Healer

"We need to find a bed or something; it'll help ease the tension on your back."

Katara fought a stutter as she said that, knowing it must've sounded so awkward as she brought a limping Zuko into the Fire Nation royal palace. All the boy could listen to were the ongoing, echoing wails of his sister behind them, still chained up like an animal who refused to be tamed. He couldn't understand it... _after such an intention to kill him, why did she sound like a helpless little girl, all of a sudden?_

It was like Zuko could feel the sheer hatred in Azula melting out into her loud cries, as he and Katara slowly walked to find a resting place for the night. His body felt numb, his fingers slightly tingling from the powerful energy that had coursed through him. He had a difficult time mustering the idea that he could walk... with each one of his steps feeling like they carried a full bucket of water.

But he looked over at his savior, the girl so determined to get him to a safe place, that her blue eyes were furrowing into thin slits. Funny... how one glance at Katara could suddenly bring feeling back into his joints, and he forced himself to take each step further with his own strength.

"Quick, tell me," Katara then asked as she kept holding onto Zuko's underarm. "Where's the nearest bedchamber?"

As they entered the compounds of the royal palace, the prince mentally tried to picture every single room in the palace from where they were. _The servants' quarters were nearly a mile away, probably in lock and key... thanks to Azula's banishing them... _and then something struck the boy's mind. His eyes widened just for a second, looking over to the left side of their corridor.

"Over there." Zuko pointed with his chin, at a pair of grand, cherry-wooden doors that stood a good twenty yards away from them. His voice almost softened into an embarrassed, and ironic tone. "It's my mother's room."

He could see Katara raising an eyebrow at him, then, but the boy didn't think an explanation was necessary.

But the girl still stared over at the door ahead of them, and the location of it that puzzled her. Having it be such a long way away from the royal quarters... it looked like his mother had preferred to be no different than a palace _servant_, to say nothing of being Fire Lady herself.

It seemed like years had passed before they finally made it to that room, Katara kicking the doors open with all of her might. By the solemn, dim light that welcomed them in, it seemed like decades had gone since that bedroom had last been occupied. The small space had been well-kept, nevertheless, as it seemed that the servants had dusted and changed the sheets often, remaining loyal to their Fire Lady... believing that someday she would return.

Zuko could barely take in the solitary quietness of that room, carefully letting himself out of Katara's grasp to sit at the foot of the bed. He was keeping a set of tears from forming in his eyes.

Yes... they _had _beaten Azula once and for all, and he could even _sense _that Aang was holding his own against the Fire Lord even then. But somehow, sitting in that room encrusted with memories of a woman he'd taken for granted so long ago... _Zuko couldn't help but feel that he'd already lost. _

And Katara watched him, quietly, as he took in those memories that rushed invisibly from the space between his toes. She wanted to say something to him... after the intensity of the fight he just lived through, placing her life before his in that act of impulse... but her mind was a maelstrom.

All she could think about was the time they'd seen eye-to-eye, back in the secret undergrounds of Ba Sing Se. She still remembered his voice as he poured his heart out to this stranger (and _enemy?_) in the memories of his mother, explaining what the Fire Nation had done to her. No matter how much Katara denied it, she'd felt a certain connection to him, then... and she remembered the sheer hatred that formed in her throat when Zuko broke that trust to join his sister.

That seemed like ages ago... and yet here they were, reunited after a matter of _months_... holding each other's presence in a small, uninhabited room like nobody else in the world existed.

It all made sense to her now, as she kept her gaze on Zuko's firm and withdrawn face.

_He'd always been alone._

She saw the choice this boy had made since their encounter in Ba Sing Se... and Katara's eyes almost glimmered, seeing not just the result of a lightning bolt course through him... but _months and months _of inner turmoil. Things she couldn't even begin to understand.

And Katara felt her heart beating rapidly, realizing how much she longed to know what was going on in that boy's mind. So many feelings were filtering between them, and yet they could barely exchange a look.

Instead, Zuko pressed a hand over his newer scar. He grunted, trying to breathe easily, and Katara immediately moved to tend to him.

"Here, why don't you lie down?"

Katara touched his shoulder lightly, and Zuko flinched by the softness of her hand. It was like he'd practically forgotten about her healing ability... and felt his mind fall vulnerable to the pair of sapphire eyes that studied him. The boy could sense a trembling in the girl... and without saying a word, he slowly moved fully onto the bed.

For some reason, all he could think about were her eyes... those same eyes that had once fearlessly glared at him and a group of pirates... all her might reflecting through that icy blue labyrinth. And Zuko's heart almost sank, believing that in spite of all the lightning he'd swallowed for her.... _nothing_ could ever make up for the suffering and pain he'd caused.

But Katara's hand lingered on his shoulder as he laid down, comforting the person who'd saved her life as a matter of _choice_. She sat herself on the bed next to him, unafraid to show the gratitude once again with a smile. She could feel her heart beating rapidly, sensing the goosebumps in Zuko's skin from the sudden awkwardness this position was giving them.

It was Zuko who smiled then, warmly bringing a few fingertips to meet ones of the girl who'd shown so much kindness to him. Kindness he didn't deserve. And it was why his eyes widened... when by impulse, Katara wrapped her fingers around his hand, holding him tightly.

They still said nothing. Strangely, they didn't have to.

It was all being told within the soft exchange of their eyes and the tiniest of smiles as they gazed at one another. The way Katara brushed her other hand along his burned cheek was enough to bring Zuko's eyes to tears.

She couldn't remember anything else, outside of that moment... desiring to heal this boy from all the lightning that painfully still coursed through his body. She didn't want him to feel any more pain. _At least, if she could help it. _

Without even hesitating, Katara carefully undid Zuko's robe, bringing her trembling arms over to the injury while her fingers summoned the water from her pack once again.

But it was Zuko who kept moving along the bed, as if inviting Katara to bring herself closer to him. And she did just that, putting a leg around to sit over Zuko's waist in such a professional manner... but feeling her cheeks flush with inevitable color as she did so.

Her hands then held the water over his chest, again. It was like a soft, vibrant glow.

And the healing session commenced with the lightest touch of flesh and water passing onto Zuko's bare torso. He closed his eyes, sensing the injury acknowledging itself somewhere beneath his ribs. Strangely, he welcomed it... feeling a girl's delicate hands course the water within his body... and the boy had never felt more protected. More at peace.

He then watched how Katara was sitting over him, healing with her eyes closed. Zuko grinned, intrigued, but more than anything he longed to see her eyes again. He slowly placed a hand over Katara's healing fingers, and let the water sooth his dry palm.

Her glimmering blue eyes appeared, but with a firm, teasing smile that said 'y_ou're breaking my concentration, stupid_.' As he held his soft, rigid hand in place for what seemed forever, Katara was the one who moved this time... her face so close that Zuko felt the lightness of her nose brush against his own as he laid flat on the bed.

"K...Katara?" He whispered, curious and almost frightened by this contact._ Was it possible? Could she be feeling the same way? _The traces of sweat on her skin was what surprised him, but Zuko refused to let himself tremble even more with the nervousness trailing along his heart.

His nose slowly responded to her touch, nuzzling along her face... tracing the alignment of the girl's nose and her cheeks with his small trembling lips. Zuko closed his eyes, taking in Katara's genuine scent of waterlilies for the time, and he slowly moved them both further towards the front of the bed to be in a slight sitting position with her.

And the girl sighed, albeit nervously, feeling almost every inch of her tremble like an earthquake as she continued to heal the boy's wound. Katara was questioning something in her mind... a prophecy that had been brought to her by a clever fortuneteller almost a year ago at the start of this intensifying journey. She remembered how that old, wise woman had promised that someday, this waterbender would marry a very powerful bender... and Katara blinked.

_But it's... it's Aang! Right?_ she thought to herself. _Wasn't it always supposed to be Aang?_

Katara froze, then, feeling the warmth of Zuko's nose brush carefully along her cheek as she tried to gather her thoughts. She remembered his daring determination to kill the Avatar, and how much she said she'd never forgive him, thinking he would never change. But then, the ferocity of that recent Agni Kai crossed her mind, again, seeing him fight his own ruthless sister with all the incredible energy and guilt built up inside.

She couldn't believe how courageous, how unconditionally strong this boy had become. And here he was, now... comforting her cheek with the softness of his ivory skin.

Katara laughed quietly, letting these young feelings sink further into her very self. The old Fortuneteller's voice passed serenely along her ears, echoing as if she'd been holding those words forever.

_I see a great romance for you, my dear. Someday... you will marry a very powerful bender. _

The girl's eyes glimmered to the dark-haired boy as he nuzzled her, embracing the warmth and the irony of it all.

Slowly, she moved her trembling lips closer to Zuko's welcoming face... and finding his lips... Katara accepted her destiny.

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**A/N - This isn't a Kataang-bashing fic. I love both ships equally for many reasons, and I wanted to give the possibility of Zutara justice. Seriously... didn't the fact that she healed his fatal lightning wound _without_ Spirit Water bring anyone else to tears? *sigh* I'll add a couple more chapters when I have the time. --MM**


	2. Confused

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**NOTE: this is a small add-on I decided to write, going off the balcony scene between Katara and Aang in _The Ember Island Players_. I figured that in order to make Zutara work, we first needed to get a glimpse of the alternative... and _why _Katara would choose not to go that route. I wish I could've written this scene in the episode; to me it just seemed that after being so true and certain of herself since Day 1, it was really un-Katara-like for her to be 'confused.' Blah, fandom. --MM  
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"_In the play!_"

Aang fought not to gesture so wildly as he exclaimed finally, almost baffled that Katara had missed such a detail.

"It was when you said I was like a _brother_ to you... and... and you didn't have feelings for me."

"Aang, I don't understand," was all she could mutter as a response, looking elsewhere rhetorically.

_The girl crossed her arms as if cold by the night's breeze, looking out into the moonlight. She had a feeling he would bring this up sooner or later, and Katara just wished he'd been brave enough to keep it in his thoughts for... well... for just a bit longer._

But of course it was too late. Katara held her breath, waiting for Aang's voice to come up again.

"We kissed in the invasion, and I thought we were gonna be together," the boy lowered his eyes, looking away as if defeated. "But we're not. It's like you're pretending it never even _happened_."

"What do you expect me to do, Aang?" a pair of glimmering blue eyes flared at him unexpectedly, angrily. Frustrated. "Go around and sing about it to everybody? Telling them that in spite of all this deadly chaos, and this war_... we finally found each other!?_'"

Aang flinched at the sarcasm in Katara's voice, and at the harsh gesturing of her hands. He remained calm, however, attempting to bring her back a certain peace.

"I..." the boy searched for words out in the dark ocean, then looking bravely at her eyes as he spoke quietly. "I thought we could at least talk about it."

Katara sighed, looking out into the ocean as well as her voice returned to her natural eloquence.

"We have more important things to worry about."

Aang blinked, not having to guess there was something else she wanted to say. By the sound of her voice, it seemed there were _many _things she was keeping within her own troubled mind.

All of a sudden, he felt like that conversation in the cave... the storm... had happened so many years ago. It wasn't like Katara to be so distant, and Aang narrowed his eyes to her.

"_I'm _worried about _you_," he said in terrible honesty, but through a pure heart.

"Well, worry about the _world_," Katara whispered back almost too quickly, meeting his eyes with a quivering set of brows. "Think about what you're going to do when you face... _him_... and he sends his first fire-blow at you."

Aang lingered there, his silver eyes dry as he studied the assertive, almost exhausted complexion of the girl he loved. The seconds passed so slowly that Katara could no longer lock eyes with him, feeling her very self cave in with that same old apprehension. Quietly, she let go of the rail.

"_Then_ we can talk."

That was what she said before she finally took her leave, not bothering to meet Aang's eyes a second time as he remained at the balcony, heavy with burden. Any other day, she would've gladly stayed by his side... but Katara was afraid that another second would make her firm voice break, and the inevitable tears would follow.

But she needed to be strong.

She needed _the Avatar _to be strong, most of all.


	3. Equals

**A/N: Finally, another chapter! I wanted to find a way to have Zuko and Katara reconcile the right way, and something about the _Firebending Masters _episode just gave me the perfect opportunity. Sure, Katara blatantly bashed Zuko about his firebending skills, but if it's one thing we know about Katara, she can't go to sleep peacefully when there's guilt in her heart. I always had a feeling she respected Zuko... if anything, for his ability to be persistent and not give up on anything... because he reflected so much on the type of person _she _represented to the Gaang. So in a way, Katara and Zuko are each other's _equal! _While this may not bring the element of true love, it's definitely a lean towards that direction! ^^ -MM**

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"No luck?"

She'd caught him off-guard, making him land from his _Shaolin _tumble on a weak footing.

Katara yelped aback instantly, hearing Zuko groan from his badly-turned ankle and the utter embarrassment that his Firebending had _stil_l not made a sign of return.

"_Why did you sneak up on me like that_?" came his voice, as harsh and raspy as ever. It didn't seem to make the girl feel any better about her mistake, but it gave her an excuse to scoff.

"Look, I was just wondering if you were _hungry!_" She threw at him with equal volume, trying to keep the dignity in her stature as she clutched the small bag of food with a hand. "I didn't come here to taunt you."

Zuko stared at her skeptically, the off-angle look in his eye acknowledging his aching joint.

He'd been practicing on the valley over the Western Air Temple late into the night, and assuming that this loss had taken Zuko's appetite, Katara managed to save a portion of the Temple's wild chestnuts before Momo got to them. After an entire dinnertime full of ridicule about his lost craft, she knew her face was the last one Zuko wanted to see that night... and she'd gone to bed with a smug grin on her face. But somehow... as much as Katara tried to brush off what she said about that boy who'd caused so much grief to her that year... she couldn't sleep.

And now here she was, feeling completely out of her own skin with guilt. She brought out the bag of food to the restless prince as he sat on a rock near the cliff's river massaging his ankle.

"I'm sorry about what I said, earlier," Katara attempted redeem herself of the put-downs. Slowly she approached him, the moonlight drawing his features more clearly.

Zuko gave a rare snort of sarcasm, "No you're not."

She blinked, amazed that he doubted what she had said so quickly. It was the same feeling she got whenever Toph decided to acknowledge Sugar Queen's latest example of 'motherly-ness' to the group. Sometimes it _was_ uncomfortable to have that frankness be said out in the open... but Katara felt even _more _humiliated by the fact that Zuko could already note a lie from her.

Someone whom she hadn't considered as a friend – no, _ally to the Avatar_ - until a few days ago.

Katara restrained herself from picking a fight, and just raised a brow at him. "Okay... _no_. I'm not _entirely_, alright?" She took a breath a walked a bit closer to the brooding Zuko. "Let's face it. You deserve every insult on the _planet_ after what we've had to go through because of you."

The prince could tell by the strength in her voice, this sort of talk was making her feel better. "I know, and... I'm glad you're willing to trust me again. That's all I needed."

Katara studied his upset copper eyes, as if feeling judged by her towering presence as she stood near him. With one sigh, she let those surprising set of words sink in, finally settling herself down near Zuko as he rubbed his ankle joint with a thumb.

Seconds seem to pass quietly, as Katara handed Zuko the chestnuts and the boy courteously took a few bites. They both watched the bright moon hang to the dark sky as if through an invisible string, the moonlight paving a lovely undulant road in the river. It wasn't until Zuko finally set aside the half-empty bag of food when he spoke up again to the girl.

"Thank you," he rasped without looking at her face.

Katara smiled humbly as her response, feeling that she had done her job to made sure all the kids were nourished. As she got herself up to leave, Zuko spoke up again.

"Give yourself a break tomorrow. I can make tea for everyone."

It's what made Katara blink again, turning her head to study his offer amusingly. _Was he giving her a day off from Motherhood?_

Zuko stared back at her, oddly, wondering if it was something he'd said wrong. But the girl couldn't help but laugh to herself as she answered, "Deal."

_When was it, exactly, _she thought, _that you decided to become a grown-up, Zuko? _It was like all of a sudden, their last encounter in the Ba Sing Se catacombs crossed through her mind. Katara couldn't remember the last time she'd spoken to somebody so openly, without boundaries... without hiding her feelings in the fear that nobody else would understand her pain.

But Zuko had. In all of its unexpected brilliance, Zuko knew what it had been like to lose a mother... to feel that _emptiness_ whenever you got out of bed without that warmth holding you, and feel the ground _crumbling_ every time you wondered how life could have been different. He knew how it felt to not remember what being a kid was like... having to face the cruelty of war and broken families, and taking responsibilities that encapsulated you from the world. And he knew, most of all... how it felt when_ nobody _could stop you from yelling or crying or screaming your way into perfection... how lonely it was to be that way.

She kept those thoughts wandering through her head, as she picked herself up from the rock. Going to sleep didn't really seem like the best option anymore, with her mind being fully active, and her presence with Zuko becoming less and less of a burden.

"I'm gonna go for a swim." Katara gazed out towards the moonlight on the undulant water, before returning her eyes to Zuko again. "It helps me clear my mind a little bit."

He raised an odd brow, but nodded all the same, looking out into the same moonlight that danced along the river. Zuko could understand how swimming could bring inner peace to a waterbender's flustered mind... because he imagined that it must've been exactly how he felt whenever - with so much patience - a small flame would take life in his hands.

_Firebending_. The art of extending one's passionate spirit into a strong, colorful aura of energy.

Zuko thought he'd known this craft inside and out... believing that if he pursued it skillfully, determinedly... the fire would never leave him. But of course, it did. He still had no idea why the spirits of _Agni _chose to betray him at this time of need, when the Avatar was desperate to learn that skill. Not being able to Firebend had brought an unspoken humiliation to Zuko that entire day, how after persevering so much for a second chance... the boy felt so empty. Useless.

He frowned, still feeling the waterbender's presence standing near him in wonderment. As they both looked out at the moonlit water, an evening breeze passed by... and Zuko crossed his arms.

The boy had never felt so cold. So out of his own skin.

Katara fought an awkward glance, speaking up to him again just as the breeze passed.

"Do you want to come?" She blinked, clearly noting the odd glance Zuko had thrown to her, looking away sheepishly. "It's not like the water's there solely for _me_. Maybe it can help you relax, too."

She placed a hand to her arm, uncomfortably, telling herself to start walking forward to the river and just forget about this awkward set of words she'd just put together as an invitation. _Why did it sound so strange? And why in the world didn't she just go into the river and let him be?_

A few seconds seemed to pass in silence, and Zuko narrowed his eyes as he finally spoke. "This isn't a trick, is it?"

Katara raised a brow, unprepared. "What? _No... _no, of course not."

"I have this feeling you're going to drown me the moment I step in," Zuko rasped, a slight tone of embarrassment leaving his barely audible voice.

The girl's face flushed from color, glancing back at the water as she took in Zuko's theory... and before she could stop herself, a light musical laugh came from her mouth. It wasn't a laugh of ridicule, much to Zuko's surprise, but rather... more _honest. _ _Genuine_.

"Am I really that frightening?" she said in slight chuckle, looking at him in disbelief.

And Zuko felt his cheeks turn warm, blushing inexplicably in the darkness. His voice came out sternly this time, trying to speak over the girl's sincere laughter.

"_Hey, _I'm not _scared _of you," the boy clarified with as much boldness as he could muster. Katara merely shook her head amusingly, as Zuko continued his explanation. "I'm... just not sure I like this idea of being in your element, when I'm _completely defenseless_."

"Well the choice is yours, Sifu Hotman."

Katara smiled a final glance to this hesitant prince in disbelief. She began to walk towards the river... her features fading into a dark and unfamiliar silhouette.

"I guess you're just going to have to _trust _me!" she shouted over to him from the distance.

And that irony swung across Zuko like a teasing slap in the face.

The boy watched her... his arms crossed with a strange mix of intrigue and apprehension... as Katara soon _ran_ towards the flowing river carefree... removing her blue warrior tunic and her shoes. Her darkened figure waded gracefully into the water, laughing. She was barely up to the knees in the river when she took the liberty of diving herself in, letting her brief disappearance reach Zuko's still-pondering presence on the edge.

_What if this _was _a trick?_ He wondered brutally, as the girl's figure rose up to the surface in a deep breath for air. For a moment, Zuko sensed her tranquil blue eyes locking with his in that dimness of the moonlight. He could see by her grace that she meant well... _but why did he feel like she was subconsciously luring him into a... trap?_

And Zuko blinked, bewildered. Confused.

After a moment, he realized he had felt this way only once before... when he felt so _vulnerable_ about a choice, it had practically broken him into a new person.

Yes, it _did_ feel ridiculous, comparing this waterbender's invitation to that final confrontation with his _father... _but Zuko's feelings never betrayed him. That decision had molded him - Zuko remembered easily - into a man that could stand his ground and not be afraid to tell the truth.

_It gave him the courage to face his mistakes... and to perhaps pay for them when the time arose. _

But the boy had never expected his heart to beat just as rapidly over a simple gesture from Katara. As it seemed, she had always carried that element of surprise to him whenever they'd both crossed paths... yet _the only thing she wanted now was his trust?_

He kept watching her swim, studying every movement Katara made at first with a keen eye for combat... wondering what sort of water-throw she would do to him. But as the seconds passed by... as he noticed that there was indeed no actual _stealth_ to her splashes and her dives... Zuko understood.

She was not threatening him at all. She was simply giving him a _chance, to be himself._

His eyes glistened, unprepared to take such thoughts. Zuko couldn't remember the last time he'd been able to move so freely... without any sort of complexities in his mind about the world, or the War, or the numerous expectations given to a young Fire Nation prince.

_The girl's laughter then came to life in his ears. It was the first time he had heard it so clearly._

Zuko took a calm breath, watching Katara's slender silhouette move along the path of the moonlight. There was no way of telling if this girl would fool him... but somehow, beneath those unregistered beats of his heart... that thought didn't seem so life-threatening, anymore.

_It was a chance he had to take. _

And the young prince bravely took off his shirt, carefully removed his shoes... and made his way into the mildly cold river to join a friend for a swim.


	4. Fate

He admired it.

The way her olive skin would always carry a glow whenever he made love to her.

Years had passed, and yet every time he found himself undressing in front of Katara's eyes - even at the smallest gesture of removing his shoes - Zuko felt goosebumps lingering below his scalp. It was with the hesitation, excitement and curiosity no different than a young boy's.

To share that mutual, nervous laughter that first night was an establishment of two life-long friends... but to be with her, hearing her soft moans and lovely whispers asking him to stay close... was something out of another person's dream.

Some nights, he traced his fingers through her hair along her delicate dents of her spine, wondering if she indeed was real. She would smile at him, lovingly and assuredly, doing the same towards the left part of his face... the place where she had first taken the bold move to touch him, entering the darkest realm of his past simultaneously. And he would close his eyes, overwhelmed by the gentleness of her touch, eager to open them again just to see her beautiful face.

The face of a warrior... who had chosen to make this less-than-perfect Fire Lord a part of her life.

Zuko didn't understand why their destinies had ultimately decided to make such a twist in their paths, but those memories of her kept returning to his mind. He remembered how she stood her ground against any of his attacks... the only _real_ blockade he had of capturing the Avatar... how she represented something he had simply denied to accept at the time.

_That no destiny could come without passion. Compassion._

And to think... there was a certain time when Zuko only wanted one person's love - the one who had shown the least amount of compassion on the face of the world. Yes, the boy _had _made many mistakes, and when he finally admitted to them in front of Katara... the only thing he had asked for was forgiveness.

But he'd never expected to keep thinking about her kind words... about... _her_... after she finally hugged him.

_And he let his confused feelings subside... surrendering, the moment she decided to kiss him._

"I don't trust it, sometimes."

Zuko mumbled half-heartedly in a tease, positioning himself more comfortably under Katara's frame as they rested on the bed.

The girl laughed, bemused, lifting her frame slightly to look at her husband's face.

"What? What don't you trust?" she murmured, their bare legs entwining playfully under the blankets.

Zuko gazed at her, pausing with interest and a coy grin before saying... "Fate."

Katara's eyes narrowed, bringing a slight bit of weight onto Zuko's frame as her forearms rested there. And while Zuko prepared to explain himself further, he caressed one of those lovely arms up to the shoulder, where her dark brown hair draped down to his ivory skin.

"I don't understand how it can bring something so good..." he rasped softly, "without having a catch."

He made that crooked grin she adored so much, and Katara couldn't help but roll her eyes and purse her lips.

"I think you're just being superstitious," she said, resting herself fully onto him and dismissing that apprehensive thought with her chuckling voice. "Besides, we've been through enough of the bad stuff. I'd say this is makes it even."

"Hmm, maybe," Zuko remarked, receiving his wife with open arms once again.

They cuddled in the blankets, hearing the softness in their breaths and looking up to the cherry wood ceiling together. Katara closed her eyes and felt the soothing rhythm of Zuko's heartbeat, believing... _concluding_ that Fate had already made its decision, long ago.

And as she felt his fingers gracefully brush her hair to sleep, the girl smiled serenely... so thankful to have Fate on their side.

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**A/N - man, I cringe writing love scenes. No matter how you look at a moment, describing it just becomes way too cheesy. XP But I am kinda satisfied with how this turned out, despite the shortness of it. Sometimes love scenes need to be simple and brief... otherwise it'll just be dragging forever. Anyway, I hope you liked it! -MM**


	5. Love

The calmness of his mother's gentle face had not left for a second, even as she watched the young Fire Lord compose himself meekly after she'd spoken her peace.

"_What do you mean you're going to talk to Dad_?" Zuko questioned, with irreplaceable bite. "He hates us. He hates_ you!_"

Ursa brought herself up from the red velvet chair she had once enjoyed resting on years ago, realizing that no such feeling could make this transition easier.

"Zuko, please, listen to me." Her voice was just as eloquent to him, only a slight hint of age. "You know your father was not always like that."

Those words caught him off-guard, and for just a moment he'd felt himself fall back into that six-year-old self… back when Lu Ten was alive… back when those stays at Ember Island were more lighthearted and naïve...

"It doesn't matter," Zuko forced, feeling the weight of his crown urge him to look at his mother in the eye. "He may as well rot in prison for the rest of his life. I don't want you to feel obligated to anything."

Ursa just looked at him, sadly. Sincerely.

The boy could only look back then, not feeling the blink in his eyes as they exchanged a quiet moment of sadness and reassurance that yes… so much time had passed since their last talk. That time could not be taken back, and yet their Nation still had to be reborn.

"Mom," Zuko spoke softer this time, "… _even if I have to change our laws of marriage…_"

"It's not an obligation for me, sweetheart."

He blinked, perplexed. "What is it, then?"

"It's love."

"Love." The boy just repeated after moment, standing there perplexed and now utterly bemused by such a simple explanation… almost believing it to be a joke. He looked away, muttering something in his mouth before spitting the same word out again. "_Love."_

"Zuko… " Ursa approached her son as she spoke, her head feeling heavy with every small step she took. "I never told you this, for your own sake… but I was betrothed to your Uncle from the day I was born."

The taste in his mouth had suddenly fallen dry, lost in thought. "_What?_"

"The Fire Sages had sealed that position to me, as the first granddaughter of Avatar Roku."

She had finally met up to him, and Ursa did not hesitate to lay a hand on the boy's bewildered face. Zuko's golden eyes darted as they faced her.

"Iroh was already your age by that point, and just like you… he was resentful of those obligations given to him. He couldn't imagine himself marrying someone he did not love, and the ideas of ruling a country under such entrapment and law… _he left_."

"Uncle had left the Fire Nation…" His raspy voice was acknowledging his mother's facts, his head still ringing from this news and wondering what in the _hell _it had to do with-

"Yes." Ursa spoke simply, letting the ease of her voice narrate the type of person he'd never imagined Uncle could be. "He had run away to the North Pole to escape his own element and his country. That's where he met her."

"Her?..." the boy's eyes were beginning to glimmer involuntarily. "You mean…"

And Zuko stopped, remembering Lu Ten very vividly right then and there_… how his eyes had always carried the softest hint of blue._

Ursa smiled in response.

"Your aunt Nimue was young, but she was very wise." The woman found herself looking out into the balcony, then, observing the royal gardens that all by now seemed so lifeless. She spoke to her son assertively, telling him what she had seen. "I could not imagine anyone strong enough to mold your uncle to the person he is today. She taught him her ways of grace… _her element…_ and she told him that running away from his identity would be the worst betrayal one could ever do. She did not want him to live a lie."

"So… that's why he came back," Zuko configured himself, folding his arms and letting the hereditary mark between his eyes show. He did not need to ask how Lu Ten had come into the picture.

_Somehow, he'd always believed his Uncle was a stronger man than keeping secrets, especially those that involved personal failure and illegitimate children._

"Yes." Ursa brought her son's lingering mind back. "With her help, Iroh knew he was destined to be Fire Lord, and he was determined to regain his father's respect… _even if it meant marrying me._"

Zuko stared back at his mother, surprised to see a hint of sadness in her face. But it only took a moment for him to realize that the sadness composed so many more layers.

"The Fire Sages," the boy clicked his teeth. "They _found out_, didn't they."

Ursa crossed her arms as well, remembering that part of history quite vividly.

"Yes, in one way or another, they knew that the crowned prince had expected a child out of wedlock and out of their Nation. It was perhaps the worst sense of disloyalty he could have made to his country, but Iroh was insistent that this child he bore from the water tribes could be acknowledged as a respectable leader of the Fire Nation one day. I don't know how Azulon accepted it, or why… but he _did_. He _knew_ your Uncle had fallen in love with Nimue, and he could not bear to lose his son a second time."

Zuko just watched his mother's eyes glimmer against the balcony's incoming light, feeling the weight of her words as she spoke them. It was like she'd never disappeared.

"He challenged the Fire Sages to accept this child as one of their own, He wanted to raise him to be a proud member of their military, as a way of gaining status and honor in the royal family. This was before your time, Zuko, but your Uncle had brought Nimue and their unborn child to the palace. It was just after the Sages had brought me to the palace."

Ursa's soft features had suddenly turned more rigid, uncomfortable as she stood near the balcony. A small crease also appeared between her eyes, and Zuko immediately knew that as a sign of disgust.

"They had plans…_those bastards…_" the young Fire Lord muttered before he could stop himself, before Ursa threw that disapproval wince in her eye. Yet the woman stood the same way, letting this grown-up version of her boy take in this information as he would.

She kept willing to speak her mind.

"I was too young to notice anything at the time, but I could see in your Uncle's eyes even now. He still questions if Nimue had truly died from childbirth… _complications, they said_… but the miracle of Lu Ten was something that the entire royal family cherished. Azulon grew to love that boy, eventually, almost as much as he loved the surprise of your father's birth."

Zuko almost couldn't piece it together, how the same man who had once ordered Ozai to slay his own son had been so _full of unconditional love._ What brought this terrible change? _How could a family so peaceful and understanding create nothing but years of terrible, backstabbing treachery?_

"And I _grew up_ with them, Zuko." Ursa's soft voice came back, and the story was coming in full circle. "Lu Ten, your father and I… we were such playmates back then, and we watched your Uncle mourn over the loss of his love and tried to cheer him up. But it took me a long time to realize that a love like that could never be replaced."

Zuko's eyes glimmered, his arms still cross and his mouth still dry as his mother spoke.

"_It's how I grew to feel about your father._"

"Stop calling him that, Mom," Zuko frowned, the crease between his eyes almost hurting. "_Please._"

"Lu Ten became Iroh's purpose in the world," Ursa softened her features once again and brought a hand to his tense Fire Lord shoulder. "He led his country's military with the sole idea that his son would pass off as a wonderful leader someday. _But then he was killed, Zuko. _Conveniently."

A grip had formed on the hand that stayed on his shoulder, and it brought Zuko's tense eyes into almost fearful, confused insight as he saw his mother's face.

"No. _No. It was an accidental death, Mom!" _Zuko could even feel himself shaking his head. "I read it in the military documents. _Uncle confirmed it._"

Zuko stepped back almost subconsciously, and Ursa just closed her eyes to make a heavy sigh. This was already far deep in the past for her.

"_Accidental or not, _Lu Ten's death nearly broke him." Tears were forming in her eyes. "Do you realize what he tried to do after he found out his son was gone?"

"Mom…" The boy could not even place a single memory of his mother crying. His entire world seemed to be crumbling now, with these small secrets.

"Your Uncle left the siege in Ba Sing Se for the North Pole. He wanted to surrender himself in the water tribe culture… _Nimue's _culture… and stay there until he could no longer feel pain in his heart." Ursa covered her eyes with the same hand that had gripped her son's shoulder, already feeling tight gulp of pain in the back of her throat.

"When I left you, Zuko_, the first thing I went to do was find him._ It took me just over a year to realize that he had other intentions in the North Pole and its Spirit Oasis."

"The Spirit World…" Zuko could only vaguely remember his small encounter with Katara in that place. How warm and peaceful the surroundings made it to be, and how it seemed to be the link to another world altogether. "Was he… _was he trying to…_?"

She nodded.

"Zuko…_ he was drugging himself, believing that if he stayed in tune with the spiritual elements of Tui and La long enough, he would be able to commune with Lu Ten and bring him back._ When I found him, he was at his worst," Ursa shut her eyes tightly and sniffled before looking at her son with heavy tears. "He had not eaten in weeks, and Chief Arnook was ready to rid his hospitality and send him out of the North Pole without anywhere to go. I nursed him back to health in the North, Zuko. I knew it's what I had to do."

_Almost instantly, he felt a certain wince of pain in his chest, and he remembered himself lunging in front of Katara as his sister's lightning had aimed for her heart. _

_His heart. _

_It was his heart that took the blow, because he couldn't bear to see a beautiful girl suffer from his long-deemed mistakes. He had placed his own worth before someone else._

"Is _that_ what love is?"

"When I told him about the treason, your Uncle forgave me. And because of my banishment from the Fire Nation… he could only think of one thing to do. Iroh returned to the palace with the purpose of caring for you in my place, and your father – perhaps more for his own vulgar amusement – accepted. What your Uncle did for me was _more_ than love, Zuko."

_It was the right thing to do._

"It's the reason why I cannot give up on your father now, or your sister."

"Mom, they don't deserve forgiveness."

_Forgiveness. _

_That word echoed in his mind as he said it, recalling how Katara had deemed it impossible with the man who'd killed her mother. He imagined how it must've felt for her to look at Aang the same way, knowing that she could never forgive such a monster no matter what the Avatar advised. He remembered feeling her pain, realizing that she could not kill that man for the sake of following the boy's wisdom... and he remembered the warmth of her arms when he eventually told her... under his mask... that the deed had been done.  
_

'_Love isn't the same as forgiveness,' he thought. _

"Not from you, Zuko, I understand." She wiped the small stream of tears escaping one of her eyes. "But, even if it takes the rest of my life… I think it's time that I tried to fix our family."

_He knew that the Avatar was blessed and cursed with the ideals of balance… how he had to love everything equally, seeking out the best of the individual as well as the world. Zuko remembered when the young boy had toyed with the idea of them being friends, wondering how such a kid could see such potential in a torn, banished prince._

"Mom, I… you don't have to do this."

_It was why he had practically gone through Agni to try and bring Katara back to the beautiful, brave girl she was without that grudge__.__  
_

_Perhaps it was why… in return… she had gone out of her way to finally locate this person standing right in front him, now._

_Zuko was finally beginning to understand what his Uncle had tried to explain all those years they had wandered off in the world. _

"I know, sweetheart." A small, almost too-familiar smile had then appeared on the woman's face. "But I want to."

_That when love was real, it didn't keep you still, or focused on the past. _

_It moved you forward._

_

* * *

_**A/N - I've always imagined what kind of conversation Zuko and his mother would have once they actually did reunite, and I've read a couple of Post-Avatar fics where Ursa shows up and just divorces her husband. I just wasn't all about that for some reason. Life is messy, I've never wanted to label Ozai (or Azula for that matter!) as bad people... just people who've made terrible choices. Plus ****I also figured that Ursa was just the epitome of selflessness and heart. Katara could learn a lot from her. =P**


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